WHEN THE VICTIM IS THE CULPRIT IN THE EYES OF THE SOCIETY

 WHEN THE VICTIM IS THE CULPRIT IN THE EYES OF THE SOCIETY


It should be
a normal practice for any society to condemn an act of abuse in any form
against any person but that is not usually the case as most people end up
questioning the victim inside to find out if he or she must opened the
atmosphere for such abuse.
A person is
defrauded and rather than condemn the fraudster, we focus our attention on the
motive of the victim as to why he could have been defrauded.

When
something happens, the person who first reports the matter receives the
sympathy of the receiver of such report as the victim and even when the accuser
places some fact to show he is the victim, the eyes of the receiver is blind to
it and his mind is already made up so he fails to believe the real victim.

Another
scenario is when the victim reports a matter, the culprit being smart and a
trained liar from birth makes a stunning defense that even the victim is
confused to think he might actually be the culprit.

The world is
indeed a complex and complicated region of the universe too difficult to
comprehend and some truths can never be known. Many innocent persons have been
killed or made to die for crimes they never committed. Some have spent years
even decades or even a lifetime in jail for crimes they were merely the
victims. Only a few have been alive to see the truth come to light and nobody
or law speaks on how such persons would be compensated and what happens to the
false accuser eventually. And do we really think any amount of compensation can
repair the damage caused to the victim emotionally, physically or
psychologically? What would happen to those who died?

We have had
many celebrated cases that only the even the courts could not really
resolve.  Even when the accused is
acquitted because of insufficient evident, they ask them to pay some
compensation to the alleged victim or their families. There was the case of OJ
Simpson accused of killing his estranged wife and her boyfriend. The jury found
him not guilty but he was made to pay some cash to his wife’s family. Late king
of Pop, Michael Jackson was acquitted severally in cases of child molestation
yet made to pay compensation to the alleged victim. Some of his accusers till
date still insist they were abused even if late Michael until death insisted
the accusations were false. They still give interviews and publish stories or
books detailing how they were abused and how it has affected their lifestyle
and growth amidst a hostile response from his fans who see him as a god whose
image must not be tainted.

In recent
times, beloved ‘Empire’ Jossie Smollet who plays the role of a gay character,
Jamal Lyon has been in the eyes of the storm after he accused two Nigerian
brothers of carrying out a homophobic attack on him and reported the matter to
the police. After the arrest of the brothers, the Chicago police turned the
case against him and said he planned the attack with the boys so as to get a
pay raise in the Empire cast. The police claimed they have a confessional
statement from the brothers and viable evidences and have arraigned Jossie for
criminal charges. Jossie is bitter and insist he is innocent.

Similarly, prolific
singer Robert Kelly better known as R.Kelly is in a fight of his life after
accusations from several women who appeared in a documentary accusing him of
abusing them when they were underage. R.Kelly is not new to this and had spent
years in prison. He has affinity for young girls anyways even till date and
late Aliyah had a child for him before she was 18. A man and his wife is
accusing him of abducting their daughters whom he is dating and he is accusing
them of wanting to sell their daughters while the girls are insisting they are
living with the singer on their own volition.

There are
many more of this with many careers destroyed even when the allegations have
not been proven beyond reasonable doubt. The in thing now is that ones you are
accused, you lose your jobs, acting career, brand sponsorships and nobody or
company wants to have anything to do with your name. For instance. Smollet’s
character has been removed from the last two episodes of the current Season 5,
meaning he is out of Empire completely. So the question is what if he comes out
innocent? He certainly wouldn’t make the show again because they certainly might
have probably have him dead and buried in the series movie. Truth is even when
most victims get cleared eventually, they are never the same and majority who
had read them as culprits don’t go back to read the eventual truth.

Wow, I have
said so much but let me conclude by telling my story, I will be brief, very
brief.

In my first
year in Secondary school (JSS1), what you call High School, I was just barely
13 years of age and an innocent virgin with a committed Christian background
and lifestyle. Like it is today, I would never hurt anyone or animal. I was
always at the receiving end of ridicule because I was a male who walked
feminine. They would call me woman wrapper whenever I stepped into the class
and that would make me cry. When my classmates see me anywhere in school they
would call me that.
During the Inter
House Sports, one of my classmates abused me (I think she called me woman
wrapper) as we walked down to the classroom along the field path. I didn’t provoke
her so the next Monday, I approached my Form Teacher and reported to her what
she did to me over the weekend.

When this
little girl, came to the staff room she told the teachers who were about 80%
women that I asked that I make love to her and that was why she insulted me. An
argument ensued among the teachers and a few stood by me but at the end of the
day, I was handed over to the Army man we call broken bottle who was in charge
of student discipline. He gave me 20 strokes of cane on my thigh. How I was
able to survive that only God knows and I never told my family about it even as
I write this almost 30 years after. The little evil girl left the school after
our junior secondary two years after and after the discipline, I never spoke to
her till she left. I forgave her but the incident is still in my memory and I hope
I will get to meet her some day. I look forward to that.
That incident
opened the way for other false accusations an innocent gentle me will face
later in my life as a teenager and an adult, yet every incident redefines a new
and different me. I have come to accept the realization that life is not fair.

Like I said
earlier, life is complex and complicated and the different experience we face
or have faced had given that a fairer definition. My experiences have made me
to always look the other side of the story when someone is accused of something
and I don’t believe just any story I see in the media, however how true they
make it seems and if this makes another victim on the other side of the coin
look like the culprit from my angle, I am sorry for this is the complexities, I
speak about.

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